Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Surely it will happen this month ...

I’m pretty sure I’ve talked about this before, but now I’ve seen it on so many other IF blogs that I want to address it again. The constant feeling that it will happen this month, so going to the OBGYN or doing some infertility tests or looking up an RE is a waste of good time and money.

Cycle is such an appropriate word, because it does feel like an endless cycle and despite the obvious starting and ending point, there never seems to be an obvious STOPPING point, where you stop and say, wait! It’s definitely time, I was sure yesterday wasn’t it, and today I’m sure.

I mean, CD1 means that it’s a new cycle, so maybe this cycle could be the one! It’s less than two weeks until I get to try again! I can hold out two weeks!

And then in two weeks, it’s only two more weeks until I find out for sure if it worked this month (which it surely did), and if I can’t be patient for two whole weeks, then am I really mature enough to have a child?!

What will everyone think if I go to see an infertility specialist and then I turn up pregnant that month? What will the doctor think? EVERYONE will think I am overreacting and making mountains out of molehills. I’ll feel ridiculous. Better just to wait the two weeks and see what happens.



But hey! It’s only two weeks until we get try to again.

P.S. Now that I've actually started treatment, I'm of course thinking that surely, it will happen this month. I mean, no diagnosed problems, 100 mg of Clomid, ultrasound monitoring, HCG, AND IUI. What in the world could go wrong? (<-- sarcasm)

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Thanks for sharing your thoughts!