Thursday, April 16, 2009

Here we go again - Clomid cycle #3, IUI cycle #2

AF arrived yesterday, more with a whisper than a bang. And in fact, she seemed to be hiding again this morning, although the cramps are still with me. I have my ultrasound scheduled for this afternoon.

My husband, though, that's another matter. He surprised me yesterday by asking about our options after we consider ourselves to be done with IUIs - pretty much only IVF. Then he started talking about all the stuff infertiles hear all the time - that maybe it's not meant to be, IVF is unnatural, and maybe we were meant to adopt some child that needs a good home.

I have a lot more I could say about that, but I don't think I can do it right now. I think it's something that needs a lot more thinking about before I can express it in words. So for now, I'm just going to leave it as it is - just one of our not-so-many options, all options about which I have very mixed feelings.

I'm feeling very sad and weepy today. Hopefully getting to leave work early and spend the afternoon at home after my ultrasound will make me feel better.

12 comments:

  1. Ouch. Double and triple ouch. I'm hoping and praying that this cycle will be THE cycle, and there won't be any need to further explore (or not explore) the question of IVF or other family-building options. (((HUGS)))

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh, I'm so sorry. It's amazing how overwhelming all the decisions and options can be. I'll be thinking about you. Take care of yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  3. so sorry you are having a shitty day. i hope you get some time to veg out later. it feels so overwhelming some days to think about infertility and all the choices and decisions you are forced to make because of it. good luck this cycle!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hang in there. This is such a crazy journey full of so many ups and downs. Hugs to you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm so sorry, this stuff just sucks so much sometimes. Just take it one option at a time...these decisions take time. I hope this one does the trick and you don't even have to go down that road.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Oh no! I'm sorry you are really weepy today. I'm sending you lots of good vibes for your cycle.
    *HUGS*

    ReplyDelete
  7. So sorry...hope this is the cycle for you so you won't even have to talk about anything after this! :-)

    ReplyDelete
  8. ((((Hugs)))) Hope you're feeling better and this cycle works for you.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I'm sorry to hear that you are not feeling so great. Take care of yourself. I have found that the infertility/IVF journey is a tough one. Just take it one day at a time and spoil yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'm so sorry. I just don't understand how husbands just don't understand sometimes.

    Mine was being a jerk today, and told me that I'm not making it "fun" for him. After almost 2 years of ttc our first, I can honestly say it hasn't been fun for quite a while for me.

    Big Hugs
    ~Gina (ICLW)

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'm so sorry that you're feeling so badly today. Totally understandable, but still completely sucky.

    When we realized that IVF was probably the next step for us, it was actaully me who was not so enthused about it, and the Mr. who was gung ho. We were able to get on the same page, though, after talking with the RE together. I'm hopeful that you guys will be able to get to the same place.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Best of luck to you this cycle!!! I am in the 2ww of IUI #3!

    ICLW : )

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for sharing your thoughts!