Over

My mom moved last week.  It was such a huge effort.  The last two weeks were pure hell.  We had 2 or 3 charity pick-ups (I've lost track), two trash pick-ups, and countless hours packing, sorting, and cleaning (we found THREE dead mice in the garage).  I ended up spending the night on Wednesday before the movers came, totally unexpectedly, since we were still packing up until shortly past midnight and then up at 5:45 the next morning, luckily since the movers showed up at 6:30 instead of 8 as confirmed.  After spending the night in the same clothes I'd worn for two days and putting my contact in two cups of water because I had nothing with me, my mom's cat bit my finger when I tried to get him in the carrier to spend moving day at the vet, so I had to go get antibiotics.  Then the movers did a crappy job, so my sister and I spent Friday loading up cars and transporting stuff to the new place.  We forgot a few things.  Nothing important, I really hope.  We were supposed to be out at 5pm on Friday, and I drove away with the last load at 5:30, just as the new buyers were pulling up.  The cleaners were still there - 20 years of never cleaning your house can have a brutal impact.

I have such mixed emotions.  I'm happy my mom is in a more manageable place, but I'm worried that she still won't be able to manage it - the cleaning, the organizing, the finances.  She's extremely irresponsible.  I'm angry at my mother for having her priorities so screwed up that she couldn't keep the dream house she and my father built together, due almost entirely to her irresponsibility.  On the other hand, it was way too HUGE for one person to live there, even if they could afford it.  I am angry that all the work fell on me, that I nagged and badgered for weeks to start packing, and that she never did a thing unless it was under my direct supervision, which led to these last few weeks of horrible screaming fights and stress for everyone.  And then I feel so sad for her.  She's like a child, all alone, no husband, no parents, no kids because she's driven them away, and few friends.  It's just a rough situation.

I'm also just sad for myself.  I have so many memories in that house.  My dad built the gazebo, and my husband and I were married in it.  The master bedroom has old etched glass windows that were in my grandparents' house in Pittsburgh, PA, and which my mom moved with her everywhere until installing them in her dream house in such a way that you'd have to destroy the walls to get them out.  It had a beautiful library with built-in bookshelves and an oak ceiling, my favorite room in the house, and I'll miss it so much.  But things look good in general - my mom's new neighbors seem awfully nice, and she has one friend who already lived in her new neighborhood.

So anyway.  I have my life back.  I'm so happy to spend more time with my kids again.  I'll write about them soon!  More time for my garden, I hope.  I'm taking the CBEST and will look into substitute teaching this fall, to see if I like teaching.  After I ran my last half-marathon in mid-July, I think I've laced up my shoes only once or twice, so it's time to get back to exercise, too.  And baking bread and cooking yummy fall meals.  I'm looking forward to a visit to our local Apple Hill (on a weekday, weekends are nuts up there in the fall).  And more crafting time, too.  I have so many projects in mind, mostly sewing, either quilted items or kids' clothing, but other stuff, too.  We'll be setting the kids up with real beds soon.  If I can get some good projects going, I might sell some stuff on etsy, too.  I have lots of ideas going on right now, and it's nice to be able to consider them again!  On the other hand, my house is also full of stuff I took from my mom, so I know I have quite a few days of sorting, organizing, re-packing, and getting rid of stuff in my future.

In the next couple weeks, look for me to be posting regularly again.  I hope.  There's still a lot to do around here, but life feels pretty sweet right now.