I haven't had time to write an 8-month post. I've been so super-busy, and haven't had help with the babies recently, which is a curse and a blessing together. They're so wonderful and funny and sweet and adorable and exhausting and busy and cranky and so on. I thought I'd write a bit about our daily schedule, as much as we have one.
6:30 am - babies get up, give or take 15 minutes. Turtle used to always get up first, but this week Tadpole has been up first. Whoever gets up first has a little extra cuddle time with Mama. When they are both up, they get their diapers changed and they eat anywhere from 3 to 6 ounces.
6:45-8 am - play time. They have tons of toys, and now they like to walk around holding onto our fingers. They also like their leapfrog musical table, although I am still coveting a play table I saw at a friend's house, which was older and less electronic. A recent favorite game was emptying the sock basket one pair at a time. We read board books (they're gradually getting better and being patient with reading), do a simple wood puzzle (well, they UNdo it), and play with their giant basket of toys.
8am - Papi gets up! We all go in and climb on the bed and wake him up. The babies get over-excited and it's not the most relaxing wake up for Papi. We play and chat in bed for 15 minutes, then move back out to the living room while Papi gets dressed.
8:30 - breakfast. We give the kids baby yogurt every morning - more of a habit than anything else.
9-9:15 - go down for a nap. This lasts from 20 minutes to over an hour, depending on how lucky I am. I use white noise machines since our house is under construction and there is often pounding, drilling, sawing, etc. going on. Poor little guys. I usually have to let Turtle cry it out, as no amount of rocking will get him to sleep. Tadpole needs to be rocked to sleep because she won't go to sleep on her own.
10ish - Both babies are usually up. I change their diapers and get them dressed for the day. This is the fluid part of the day. Sometimes we have plans, such as a mom's group or playdate. When it's nice, we might go for a walk. Or we run errands. Or get ready to go out for lunch. Or Grandma arrives to spend the day. Or we go to Papi's office for pizza on Fridays. Getting ready to get out of the house often takes until 11.
The babies usually nap once or twice starting around 1pm, depending on if we're out and about, or stuck at home. Sometimes I have to put them in their carseats and rock them to sleep because they won't fall asleep in their cribs. Nap time is still a major struggle at our house. The afternoon times are completely random, and they don't always nap together. When I'm at home, I try to synchronize things. Then when they're awake, we play, practice walking around the house, go for walks, or run errands.
The routine resumes again around 6pm.
6-6:20pm - Papi arrives from work, and the babies get really excited. It's very sweet. The one major drawback of staying home all day with them is that they never get THAT excited to see me.
6:30pm - baby dinner time. We eat a variety of things, either a homemade vegetable puree, or if I haven't had time to make something, we eat jarred baby food. Sometimes we mix it up with some fruit or fruit yogurt for dessert. Turtle is on a bit of a strike right now and will only eat sweet foods. I'm attempting to mix other veggies with sweet potato just to get him to eat.
6:45pm - watch music videos on you..tube. Yes, seriously. We watch a combination of Italian songs with animated videos, the Lion Sleeps Tonight video with the hippo (know what I'm talking about?), some Sesame Street music videos (our favorites are Feist and Jason Mraz), and the Gummy Bear techno song.
7ish pm - if it's a bath night, we usually start baths at this point. If it's not a bath night, we watch a few more videos
7:20pm - start getting ready for bed. Put on night-time diapers, a butt-load (literally) of diaper cream, pajamas, and sleep sacks. Babies get fluoride drops for their teeth.
7:30 pm - we take the babies to their rooms, feed them, and put them in bed. On good nights, they go right to sleep. On ok nights, they cry for less than 10 minutes and fall asleep. On the occasional bad night, they cry and cry, and we try to feed them, soothe them, whatever. They of course always eventually fall asleep, but those bad nights are rough.
They do sometimes sleep through until 6:30, but Tadpole usually wakes up once between 4 and 5:30, and either of them occasionally wake up once anytime between 10 and 3. I could do a whole post on sleep ... maybe I will. Because it's rough, even when it gets better.
And that is my life right now. It's not very exciting, but I'm happy!
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Pictures!
Quick post - babies are sleeping. First day in a long time without a family member from Italy in the house, and I had to let them cry a bit to fall asleep for their naps, since they're so used to always having someone around to rock them to sleep, but I'm really proud of myself for getting them both down (knock on wood!!!! Stay asleep please, babies!).
They're almost eight months old! It's hard to believe. Stay tuned for an eight-month post.
I tried to get them into a pre-school part time, and they are already full for next year, with one person on the waiting list. I'm starting to try to come up with other alternatives, although my in-laws will be here in April, probably, and then we'll be going to Italy this summer (hopefully), so it might be best to come up with options starting in the fall. In any case, they are still little and they are actually pretty manageable, it's just that there are a lot of things that I need to do that I can't get done.
But that's boring! Let's see a few pictures!
They're almost eight months old! It's hard to believe. Stay tuned for an eight-month post.
I tried to get them into a pre-school part time, and they are already full for next year, with one person on the waiting list. I'm starting to try to come up with other alternatives, although my in-laws will be here in April, probably, and then we'll be going to Italy this summer (hopefully), so it might be best to come up with options starting in the fall. In any case, they are still little and they are actually pretty manageable, it's just that there are a lot of things that I need to do that I can't get done.
But that's boring! Let's see a few pictures!
Tadpole and Turtle finding new ways to use the stroller:
Turtle watching the construction workers out the window of our almost-finished remodeled kitchen:
Tadpole hanging out in the snow, sporting her new shades, and acting like a mob boss (notice the potato chips AND the pacifier are both upside-down):
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Approaching seven months
We're sick. It sucks. Turtle got it first, along with L's cousin who's here from Italy to help us for a month. Turtle has had a fever as high as 103 (underarm), and his nose is running like crazy. He also has a cough. Yesterday was the most pathetic I've ever seen him, just laying in the arms of whoever wanted to hold him at that moment and being really cuddly. The cuddly thing is sort of nice. Speaking as the mom of two babies who don't normally cuddle.
Tadpole had a high fever today, and her sickness is a bit different. She has the same runny nose, but she's hoarse and is sneezing a lot (so is Mama). While she's more cuddly than usual, she's still pretty active and independent. She's a little fireball.
Overall, we're reaching an exciting time. Tadpole's been crawling (!) for a couple weeks now, although it's not a proper crawl, just a military crawl. Still, she gets around, and fast! It's a little scary, since the house is a bit of a shambles. Turtle started sitting up around the same time that Tadpole started crawling. It's funny to see the difference in their personalities. Turtle will sit up with a bunch of toys and play with them quietly, examining them and turning them over and over, with his head tilted to the side. Sometimes he cries and holds out his arms to be picked up. Occasionally he falls over, and then he cries for someone to come and set him back up or pick him up. He hasn't even tried to crawl.
Tadpole on the other hand was rolling all over the place until she got the hang of crawling so she could give that stupid rolling thing a rest. Crawling is a better way to get around! She rolled under the futon, to the back door, out of her carseat, and into a lot of trouble in general. Then she started crawling and I can't leave her alone for even a second now. She is into EVERYTHING. She rarely cries, even when she bumps her head. She steals Turtle's toys. We had to put a bumper in her crib, stat, so she wouldn't bash her head against the rails. She probably travels over every square inch of her crib five times during the night. I still think it's funny that my MIL thought she should have sheets, blankets, and a pillow!
Turtle has two teeth and more coming in. It's part of why he's so miserable now. Tadpole is finally getting teeth. She's not as miserable as Turtle.
Turtle rolled himself up inside a blanket a little while ago. Tadpole had fun inside a laundry basket. We took them up to the mountains for the first time this last weekend (which is most likely where the sickness came from). We broke out the jogging stroller last week, but now we can't leave the house with these little sickies.
We're also sleep training, with mixed success. This sickness may just set everything back. Which sucks.
I wanted to catch up to where I was, chronologically with the babes. Hope to get back on track soon. And post some photos.
Tadpole had a high fever today, and her sickness is a bit different. She has the same runny nose, but she's hoarse and is sneezing a lot (so is Mama). While she's more cuddly than usual, she's still pretty active and independent. She's a little fireball.
Overall, we're reaching an exciting time. Tadpole's been crawling (!) for a couple weeks now, although it's not a proper crawl, just a military crawl. Still, she gets around, and fast! It's a little scary, since the house is a bit of a shambles. Turtle started sitting up around the same time that Tadpole started crawling. It's funny to see the difference in their personalities. Turtle will sit up with a bunch of toys and play with them quietly, examining them and turning them over and over, with his head tilted to the side. Sometimes he cries and holds out his arms to be picked up. Occasionally he falls over, and then he cries for someone to come and set him back up or pick him up. He hasn't even tried to crawl.
Tadpole on the other hand was rolling all over the place until she got the hang of crawling so she could give that stupid rolling thing a rest. Crawling is a better way to get around! She rolled under the futon, to the back door, out of her carseat, and into a lot of trouble in general. Then she started crawling and I can't leave her alone for even a second now. She is into EVERYTHING. She rarely cries, even when she bumps her head. She steals Turtle's toys. We had to put a bumper in her crib, stat, so she wouldn't bash her head against the rails. She probably travels over every square inch of her crib five times during the night. I still think it's funny that my MIL thought she should have sheets, blankets, and a pillow!
Turtle has two teeth and more coming in. It's part of why he's so miserable now. Tadpole is finally getting teeth. She's not as miserable as Turtle.
Turtle rolled himself up inside a blanket a little while ago. Tadpole had fun inside a laundry basket. We took them up to the mountains for the first time this last weekend (which is most likely where the sickness came from). We broke out the jogging stroller last week, but now we can't leave the house with these little sickies.
We're also sleep training, with mixed success. This sickness may just set everything back. Which sucks.
I wanted to catch up to where I was, chronologically with the babes. Hope to get back on track soon. And post some photos.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Unbelievable
I honestly can't believe that so many things can go wrong with breastfeeding, as they did for me, and now something else!!!!
I don't think I ever mentioned that I gave up breastfeeding and pumping back in September. My husband and I reached an agreement that as the primary caretaker of two babies with very little help or support, breastfeeding was just not going to be possible and was already causing more trouble than it was worth. It sounds simple when I say that, but it actually took days of arguing, crying, fighting, pumping, not pumping, trying to breastfeed, babies screaming, etc., before I grudgingly agreed to give it up.
In retrospect, I have no idea why I didn't just scale it WAY back and keep pumping a couple times a day to maintain some supply so I could try to ramp it up again later if/when things got less crazy. Partly because my husband was convinced it was an all-or-nothing issue and I believed him. Partly because he thought my breastmilk was causing the babies' fussiness and I believed him again. I wish I hadn't. I wish I just maintained the possibility of breastfeeding at some point. But it doesn't matter now.
I gradually stopped breastfeeding, and because of my husband's belief that my milk was causing the babies' fussiness, I meticulously bagged and labeled every ounce and stored it in our deep freezer until I was no longer producing. I had something like 300-400 ounces (maybe more), which isn't a lot, but I hoped to give it to my babies at some point in the future.
Later in the fall, we started giving the babies one bottle of breastmilk every night with rice cereal mixed in, and every morning I found several ounces sitting on the kitchen counter from my husband's shift with the babies. He said that the rice cereal would get too thick at the bottom of the bottle and the babies couldn't drink it. I was thawing 8-10 ounces of milk per day and throwing away 2-3 ounces. It was breaking my heart. So we stopped, and I decided to wait until we got back from Italy and then I'd start giving them one bottle per day again.
Three days ago, I discovered that while we were gone, the contractors working on our house rewired the living room and in the process disconnected the sunroom where the freezer lives. Since we'll eventually demolish the sunroom, they didn't bother to hook the electricity back up in there. Everything in the freezer was thawed and had to be thrown away, including all of my milk.
It seems a bit like the final straw. Clearly the universe didn't want me to feed my babies breastmilk. I'm just really sad it all ended this way.
Coming up next - a few happy posts, I hope. Plus notes on long-distance air travel with babies. Maybe a post on how our six-month appointment will go today with the doctor who turned us in to CPS. The possibilities are endless!
I don't think I ever mentioned that I gave up breastfeeding and pumping back in September. My husband and I reached an agreement that as the primary caretaker of two babies with very little help or support, breastfeeding was just not going to be possible and was already causing more trouble than it was worth. It sounds simple when I say that, but it actually took days of arguing, crying, fighting, pumping, not pumping, trying to breastfeed, babies screaming, etc., before I grudgingly agreed to give it up.
In retrospect, I have no idea why I didn't just scale it WAY back and keep pumping a couple times a day to maintain some supply so I could try to ramp it up again later if/when things got less crazy. Partly because my husband was convinced it was an all-or-nothing issue and I believed him. Partly because he thought my breastmilk was causing the babies' fussiness and I believed him again. I wish I hadn't. I wish I just maintained the possibility of breastfeeding at some point. But it doesn't matter now.
I gradually stopped breastfeeding, and because of my husband's belief that my milk was causing the babies' fussiness, I meticulously bagged and labeled every ounce and stored it in our deep freezer until I was no longer producing. I had something like 300-400 ounces (maybe more), which isn't a lot, but I hoped to give it to my babies at some point in the future.
Later in the fall, we started giving the babies one bottle of breastmilk every night with rice cereal mixed in, and every morning I found several ounces sitting on the kitchen counter from my husband's shift with the babies. He said that the rice cereal would get too thick at the bottom of the bottle and the babies couldn't drink it. I was thawing 8-10 ounces of milk per day and throwing away 2-3 ounces. It was breaking my heart. So we stopped, and I decided to wait until we got back from Italy and then I'd start giving them one bottle per day again.
Three days ago, I discovered that while we were gone, the contractors working on our house rewired the living room and in the process disconnected the sunroom where the freezer lives. Since we'll eventually demolish the sunroom, they didn't bother to hook the electricity back up in there. Everything in the freezer was thawed and had to be thrown away, including all of my milk.
It seems a bit like the final straw. Clearly the universe didn't want me to feed my babies breastmilk. I'm just really sad it all ended this way.
Coming up next - a few happy posts, I hope. Plus notes on long-distance air travel with babies. Maybe a post on how our six-month appointment will go today with the doctor who turned us in to CPS. The possibilities are endless!
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Craziness
Back in November, our lives took a crazy turn that really leaves me wondering in retrospect how I made it through everything, but here I am. Now I can breathe and finally put this down on paper.
I wish I could pinpoint exactly when it started, but I unfortunately can only narrow it down to a span of a few days (but let's say the first day I'm sure of is the Wednesday a week before Thanksgiving). Tadpole, our sweet, smiley, happy, "easy" baby started being cranky. After a while (hours, days, who knows?) we noticed that she wasn't just cranky, she was really hysterical. She would calm down when I'd cradle her, and then fall asleep, but when she was awake she was inconsolable. We couldn't see anything obviously wrong, but after several days of this, we finally called the advice nurse. At this point it was the weekend, and the nurse thought it was worth a trip to the doctor during the week.
When Monday came, off to the doctor we went. He checked her out (although didn't undress her, which I thought was strange). He ruled out an ear infection, and chalked it up to either growing pains or teething. Then he sent us home.
On Wednesday morning, the day before Thanksgiving, we noticed that Tadpole wasn't putting her left foot down when we'd hold her up and let her feet touch the ground. If we tried to lean her in that direction, she'd pull her foot up even higher. When she was in her "rainforest jumperoo", she'd only push with her right foot, and if we tried to put pressure on the bottom of her left foot, she'd pull it away. We thought it was strange, but didn't know what else to think of it.
By Thanksgiving morning, she was still favoring her left leg and we started wondering if there was something wrong, and if it could possibly be related to the inconsolable wailing. Another call to the advice nurse - she told us that it sounded like something could be going on, but it wasn't an emergency and we should wait until Friday to go to urgent care. So we waited, but all day we kept noticing her favoring her left leg. Since there was nothing visibly wrong, we started worrying that there might be some neurological problem, and I started to quietly freak out a bit.
Friday morning, we spent hours at urgent care seeing the doctor on call (not a pediatrician). He mentioned bone cancer and joint infections, and then sent us for hip x-rays - let me tell you, getting hip x-rays of a 4-month-old baby is really sad. The x-rays checked out ok, so he made a follow-up with the on-call pediatrician for Saturday. Friday evening, I remembered that a friend's step-dad was a pediatrician, so we went to their house get another opinion - he also thought Tadpole seemed ok.
Saturday morning, we went back to the hospital for our on-call appointment - the pediatrician also had no idea what could be wrong, but my husband asked if we could x-ray her whole leg. Over an hour later and after many trips back and forth down the hospital corridors with a semi-naked baby (due to major incompetence at the x-ray lab), we had our x-rays, and the pediatrician thought everything was fine and sent us home.
Two hours later, I received a call from the doctor's office - the x-rays had been read by the radiologist, who determined that Tadpole had a fracture in BOTH her tibia and fibula, just above her ankle. We had to come back in for a splint, but she assured us that it was already healing well, and Tadpole would have no trouble crawling or walking. After thoughts of cancer, neurological disorders, and bone infections, we were incredibly relieved to have found what seemed like a minor problem that was already healing. There was nothing wrong with our beautiful baby! Our hearts were light as we let everyone involved know the result, although we still had no idea at all how the fractures could have happened.
Monday morning, my pediatrician called me. It turns out, my friend's step-dad called him and urged him to report us to Child Protective Services! I cried for an hour before I was able to calm down enough to call my husband to tell him. The next day he called back to tell us he had made his decision and felt obligated to report us. I cried again. I cried myself to sleep for several days. I imagined the county coming to take our children away from us. No one could tell us what would happen, except that someone would contact us "very soon". It took a week for them to contact us, and I lived in constant fear and anxiety, wondering when the axe would fall and what would happen.
In the end, a social worker and police officer came to our house on a surprise visit and luckily they picked a good day. The house was relatively clean, the babies were dressed in their cute Christmas outfits, and Tadpole was in a happy smiley mood (although they pointed out the birthmark on her head and asked if it was an injury, sheesh). They talked to me for a while, and asked to see where the kids sleep, and said they didn't see any problems (whew). No one followed up with us before we left for Italy, so I'm still nervous about what will happen when we get back.
At that point in my path to motherhood, I had already been feeling a major lack of self-confidence, and nothing had gone the way I expected, starting from pre-eclampsia, the induction, the entire labor and delivery process, and my failure to continue breastfeeding. I knew I was lucky to have two beautiful babies, but it seemed that everything was spinning out of control, and the constant comments and "advice" from friends, family, and strangers really chipped away at my self-confidence. To have everything culminate in my sweet 4-month-old having a broken leg and us being reported to CPS - well, I'm not sure I've quite recovered from any of it.
After all this, the daily isolation and mental strain of having two little babies, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week without a break is really starting to wear me down. I question myself and doubt everything I do. When I'm not with them, I miss them. When I'm with them, I feel anxious about how I'm going to get through the day. I sorely feel the lack of a support system, and I'm finding it harder and harder to get out of the house with two babies that are more active every day. I love them ... and that's why I've decided to start looking into getting some help and advice from a professional, as soon as we get home from Italy. I don't know if I have postpartum depression, but I have so much anxiety and depression that I think it's better to get things checked out.
So - we are in a much better place right now, but the events of the last few months still remain with me and I wanted to get it down. The next posts should be much better! Happy 2011, everyone!
I wish I could pinpoint exactly when it started, but I unfortunately can only narrow it down to a span of a few days (but let's say the first day I'm sure of is the Wednesday a week before Thanksgiving). Tadpole, our sweet, smiley, happy, "easy" baby started being cranky. After a while (hours, days, who knows?) we noticed that she wasn't just cranky, she was really hysterical. She would calm down when I'd cradle her, and then fall asleep, but when she was awake she was inconsolable. We couldn't see anything obviously wrong, but after several days of this, we finally called the advice nurse. At this point it was the weekend, and the nurse thought it was worth a trip to the doctor during the week.
When Monday came, off to the doctor we went. He checked her out (although didn't undress her, which I thought was strange). He ruled out an ear infection, and chalked it up to either growing pains or teething. Then he sent us home.
On Wednesday morning, the day before Thanksgiving, we noticed that Tadpole wasn't putting her left foot down when we'd hold her up and let her feet touch the ground. If we tried to lean her in that direction, she'd pull her foot up even higher. When she was in her "rainforest jumperoo", she'd only push with her right foot, and if we tried to put pressure on the bottom of her left foot, she'd pull it away. We thought it was strange, but didn't know what else to think of it.
By Thanksgiving morning, she was still favoring her left leg and we started wondering if there was something wrong, and if it could possibly be related to the inconsolable wailing. Another call to the advice nurse - she told us that it sounded like something could be going on, but it wasn't an emergency and we should wait until Friday to go to urgent care. So we waited, but all day we kept noticing her favoring her left leg. Since there was nothing visibly wrong, we started worrying that there might be some neurological problem, and I started to quietly freak out a bit.
Friday morning, we spent hours at urgent care seeing the doctor on call (not a pediatrician). He mentioned bone cancer and joint infections, and then sent us for hip x-rays - let me tell you, getting hip x-rays of a 4-month-old baby is really sad. The x-rays checked out ok, so he made a follow-up with the on-call pediatrician for Saturday. Friday evening, I remembered that a friend's step-dad was a pediatrician, so we went to their house get another opinion - he also thought Tadpole seemed ok.
Saturday morning, we went back to the hospital for our on-call appointment - the pediatrician also had no idea what could be wrong, but my husband asked if we could x-ray her whole leg. Over an hour later and after many trips back and forth down the hospital corridors with a semi-naked baby (due to major incompetence at the x-ray lab), we had our x-rays, and the pediatrician thought everything was fine and sent us home.
Two hours later, I received a call from the doctor's office - the x-rays had been read by the radiologist, who determined that Tadpole had a fracture in BOTH her tibia and fibula, just above her ankle. We had to come back in for a splint, but she assured us that it was already healing well, and Tadpole would have no trouble crawling or walking. After thoughts of cancer, neurological disorders, and bone infections, we were incredibly relieved to have found what seemed like a minor problem that was already healing. There was nothing wrong with our beautiful baby! Our hearts were light as we let everyone involved know the result, although we still had no idea at all how the fractures could have happened.
Monday morning, my pediatrician called me. It turns out, my friend's step-dad called him and urged him to report us to Child Protective Services! I cried for an hour before I was able to calm down enough to call my husband to tell him. The next day he called back to tell us he had made his decision and felt obligated to report us. I cried again. I cried myself to sleep for several days. I imagined the county coming to take our children away from us. No one could tell us what would happen, except that someone would contact us "very soon". It took a week for them to contact us, and I lived in constant fear and anxiety, wondering when the axe would fall and what would happen.
In the end, a social worker and police officer came to our house on a surprise visit and luckily they picked a good day. The house was relatively clean, the babies were dressed in their cute Christmas outfits, and Tadpole was in a happy smiley mood (although they pointed out the birthmark on her head and asked if it was an injury, sheesh). They talked to me for a while, and asked to see where the kids sleep, and said they didn't see any problems (whew). No one followed up with us before we left for Italy, so I'm still nervous about what will happen when we get back.
At that point in my path to motherhood, I had already been feeling a major lack of self-confidence, and nothing had gone the way I expected, starting from pre-eclampsia, the induction, the entire labor and delivery process, and my failure to continue breastfeeding. I knew I was lucky to have two beautiful babies, but it seemed that everything was spinning out of control, and the constant comments and "advice" from friends, family, and strangers really chipped away at my self-confidence. To have everything culminate in my sweet 4-month-old having a broken leg and us being reported to CPS - well, I'm not sure I've quite recovered from any of it.
After all this, the daily isolation and mental strain of having two little babies, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week without a break is really starting to wear me down. I question myself and doubt everything I do. When I'm not with them, I miss them. When I'm with them, I feel anxious about how I'm going to get through the day. I sorely feel the lack of a support system, and I'm finding it harder and harder to get out of the house with two babies that are more active every day. I love them ... and that's why I've decided to start looking into getting some help and advice from a professional, as soon as we get home from Italy. I don't know if I have postpartum depression, but I have so much anxiety and depression that I think it's better to get things checked out.
So - we are in a much better place right now, but the events of the last few months still remain with me and I wanted to get it down. The next posts should be much better! Happy 2011, everyone!
First tooth!
Turtle cut his first tooth today! We've seen it lurking under his gum for more than a week now, and today's the first day we can feel it's sharp little edge. He's not a big fan of letting people see it, although everyone's excited about it.
I hope this means he'll start sleeping slightly better, but I doubt it, since its little buddy tooth looks like it's coming in, too.
Crazy story in a post coming up soon ... as soon as I get a chance to write it.
I hope this means he'll start sleeping slightly better, but I doubt it, since its little buddy tooth looks like it's coming in, too.
Crazy story in a post coming up soon ... as soon as I get a chance to write it.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Italy
It has been months. I'm sorry. I've been busy. And tired, and stressed, and now we're in Italy! Yay!
Actually, things aren't going well here, mostly because of sleep issues. Have you ever dealt with 9 hours of jetlag? When you already have issues with insomnia? Our babies, who are now 5.5 months, adjusted after a few days. Unfortunately, we've been here a week and Mama still hasn't adjusted. I think the problem is that when you can't sleep a few nights straight through on the new schedule, your body just things you're napping. So I wake up to feed a baby, and I don't get back to sleep because hey! According to my body, it's not actually bedtime yet. Even though it's 3:20 am and I've only slept from 11pm to midnight. Ugh.
I want to catch up on the last few months, but I don't want to overwhelm with a long post. Here are some bullet points of the last few months, the current situation, and more interesting differences between Italy and the states:
Actually, things aren't going well here, mostly because of sleep issues. Have you ever dealt with 9 hours of jetlag? When you already have issues with insomnia? Our babies, who are now 5.5 months, adjusted after a few days. Unfortunately, we've been here a week and Mama still hasn't adjusted. I think the problem is that when you can't sleep a few nights straight through on the new schedule, your body just things you're napping. So I wake up to feed a baby, and I don't get back to sleep because hey! According to my body, it's not actually bedtime yet. Even though it's 3:20 am and I've only slept from 11pm to midnight. Ugh.
I want to catch up on the last few months, but I don't want to overwhelm with a long post. Here are some bullet points of the last few months, the current situation, and more interesting differences between Italy and the states:
- SIDS doesn't seem to be a blip on anyone's radar here. Babies sleep with little tiny pillows, sheets, blankets, etc. I keep wanting to tell people that they're not miniature adults, they're babies! They don't need miniature pillows.
- No one here swaddles, apparently. My in-laws keeps complaining that we're putting Turtle in a straight-jacket, and when they are watching him, they don't do it (and he doesn't sleep well). I know he's a bit old at almost 6 months, but it really does help him sleep.
- I'm worried I'm developing PPD. Can you develop it this late in the game? Actually, I think it's been coming on for a month or two now, exacerbated by some really shitty stuff that happened a little while back. I'll have to ask my hubby if he's ok with my posting it on the web, and then you'll see what I mean.
- The babies are freaking adorable. I'm so in love with them, even after I've been alone with them for hours and am just dying to hear another adult voice.
- Tadpole can roll over! And over and over and over. She's gone from a sweet, smiley little thing to a fireball of energy and attitude. She's still smiley, though.
- Turtle is a little charming heartbreaker who actually does smile and even laugh now. He's also starting to grow some hair (ahead of his poor sis). Most of the time he can only roll back to front, but I've seen him occasionally go the other way, too.
- The babies wake up a LOT at night still. It's frustrating. Especially for an insomniac.
- I am supposed to go back to work in May ... I want to rethink my career before then. I thought I wanted to be a SAHM, but I'm not so sure anymore. I think I'd like a part time job so I can get out of the house and be part of the real world again. But I don't think I can go back to my old job. So I need to figure out what I want to do.
- I'm having a very hard time maintaining friendships and making new friends. I feel very isolated, especially now that we're in the rainy season in California and I can't even get out of the house with two babies. I'm very lonely.
- I miss exercising. It was a big part of my old identity ... I spent most of my time at work, cooking/baking, gardening, and doing sports. I don't do any of those things anymore. I don't do much of anything at all anymore.
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