Lilypie - Pregnancy

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Dude, seriously?

My monitoring ultrasound this morning didn't go as expected. I expected to have one crappy follicle on the left. Instead, on the right, I had one large follice (24x22), one good borderline follicle (around 16), and two slightly smaller ones. The doctor said if it wasn't for the large one, we'd put off triggering another day. She also said that at the size of the three "maybes" there could be mature eggs in all or none of them. So I have 1-4 chances this month.

I honestly was expecting bad news, was braced for it. I am so not in the mood to be hopeful. I've been doing somewhat better with the hopeless attitude of the last few weeks, despite my nearly constant urges to cry. At least I wasn't building up my hopes for a big fall. Which is what I KNOW is going to happen.

I want to continue on my merry way, planning my summer vacation (more on that in a moment), my knee surgery, and my fall/winter IVF. I do NOT (and I WILL NOT) look up a possible due date. NO WAY! This is going to fail, I'm sure of it!

Except, sigh. I'm NOT sure of it any more, and I don't want to feel this way. I want hope to go away and, if not die, at least be comatose for a while. Let me enjoy the beautiful weather and the hopefully relaxing weekends.

As a plus, we're going on vacation! To Alaska! I'm so excited! We were considering yet another trip to Italy to go to a cousin's wedding, and maybe a few days of "real" vacation (i.e. just the two of us, without all the relatives and friends), but it was too last-minute and too expensive and too much time off of work. And we have a friend working up at Denali National Park, and we thought ... let's go! A couple days of hiking, maybe a helicopter trip, a day of fishing, maybe an overnight backpacking/camping trip, who knows? The possibilities are endless.

So ... that's what I'll be focusing on. Planning my vacation. And trying to forget about this stupid IUI.

Just for posterity, and anyone who's curious, today is CD 13, the last day of estrogen, and the day of my HCG trigger shot (tonight at 10:30). IUI on CD 15 (Saturday) at 10:30 am. HCG supplements on CD 16 and CD 19, and progesterone starts CD 19 and goes until the end (CD 29ish).

And to satisfy my curiosity, here's a couple questions for y'all. Do you know (from experience or from reading/learning/research/hearing about it) if those follicle sizes sound good? Is there a chance of more than one egg, and if so, how great of a chance? Is it unrealistic to hope that one big, one medium, and two smaller follicles might mean a higher chance of actually conceiving?

6 comments:

  1. Your follicles are probably still growing as you wait for your trigger shot. HCG also supposedly makes them grow before O. From what I have heard/read, the docs wont trigger you unless you have an ~18 mm'er (or so)... so your 16 mm'er could still be growing and be a good one too! After having several BFNs, its hard to beleive that it "just takes one"... but I guess that still holds true! Good luck! *sticky vibes*

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  2. I have no advice for you, sorry! I do, however have A LOT of hope! You can wish for hope to go away and I'll take it all for you! I'll be your cheering gal ;o)
    *HUGS*

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  3. follicles grow about 1-2mm per day and as BB said 18mm and above is what REs look for I think. So it's possible that you may have 2 viable eggs. I think what's more important though is that you have good quality eggs so try not to focus too much on the number (even though I do the same damn thing) and not to be ignored is the lining thickness. But at this point, what's there is there and you just have to do the IUI and move on! I'm about to go in for my IUI#3 in an hour. good luck to both of us. xoxoxo

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  4. based on my research, of course you have one for sure....and then as a previous poster said, those fillies keep growing right up to ovulation, so that 16 could easily be a 20 by then and have a mature follie, the smaller ones, probably not, but it is possible. sending a iltle hope your way :)

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  5. Best of luck on your journey. I have those fake pregnancy symptoms every month and I always fall for it.

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  6. It sounds like a decent possibility. Good luck. I hope though that you're able to have a stress free couple of weeks, a great vacation etc.

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Thanks for sharing your thoughts!