The little guy is sleeping on me right now. He needs a diaper change and probably a clothing change, too, but he's sound asleep on my shoulder and I don't want to move. The twins are playing happily, our au pair is probably bored out of her mind, and my Italian in-laws are (hopefully) enjoying some down time. They tend not to like to be bored. The weather is cold and wet and windy, so we are inside, where it is cozy and warm. I want to take care of paperwork, and get dressed, and really I'd like to start baking some bread, but I have this sleeping baby on me, and I just can't summon the inner strength to put him down.
Things have been good. Really good. Gecko Baby is mostly a good sleeper. We've had some rough nights, to be sure, but I'm getting 6-9 hours overall (not in a row, of course) each night, and I'm surviving pretty well on that. He's nursing like a champ, and my main problem is most likely oversupply. But I made a few minor adjustments and it seems better. This little guy sleeps a lot, usually on top of me. I haven't tried using baby carriers much at this point. I just can't get enough of holding him. I looked up a poem that I love, which usually makes me tear up a bit. Here is the last bit:
The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,
For children grow up, as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust go to sleep.
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.
By Ruth Hulburt Hamilton
And that is how I'm feeling these days. Along with a major dose of gratefulness. And a bit of exhaustion. Which is going to get a lot worse next week when my in-laws are gone and my husband is out of town.
So. All is well. We're all happy and healthy and getting ready to enjoy a nice quiet Thanksgiving. I'm still in awe over Gecko Baby's birth and how happy it makes me when I think back on it. And I don't feel sad about Tadpole and Turtle's birth either. I was worried that having a good experience this time might make me regret how things went with the twins' birth and infancy, but it doesn't at all. I'm grateful for all of it, and especially grateful for this chance at a more normal mothering experience.
So like I said - things are really good. Oh, and this little guy is going to be 3 weeks old tomorrow. Happy Thanksgiving to all.